Totally Bugging Out

Multiple Sclerosis meets the insect world

 

This week’s blog is not for the squeamish. Since I, myself, am terribly squeamish, it is not even for me. But I am completely freaking out about something so I decided I would share it with all of you, so you can freak out too.

Multiple sclerosis symptom # 1789 is a creepy crawly feeling. Often you feel like there is something creepy on you when there isn’t, that you stepped on something crawly when you didn’t.

So how is an MS’er to survive the weird bug summer of 2013?

 

I won’t bore you by repeating the previously told June experience of coming home to find two bumble bees having a party in my kitchen.

And you may still be grossed out by the fly swarm I mentioned two weeks ago.

These anecdotes were not the end of the bug world taking place in my home.

If I didn’t have to already be careful as I step around unpacked boxes, half packed boxes and empty boxes, I also have to watch out for earwigs.

Yes, earwigs. That is the name of a bug. Who came up with that???? These creepy crawly things have visited on occasion in the past, but now they have chosen to move in and I haven’t even moved out yet!

 

The flies keep coming back and so I again attempted to address this problem. When the disgusting fly strip didn’t work, and the smelly flying insects spray didn’t work, and the lame fly motel didn’t work, I took to buying a super duper bug killer that you spray inside and outside of your home. I sprayed inside and then went out to spray outside. It was while I was spraying that I was attacked by mosquitoes.

You’d think the poison I was covered in would detract them but no; at least not until they used me for a snack. Apparently, mosquitoes think I am sweet. Now my sweet skin is covered in bruises from falling and tripping, ugly red splotches from injections and itchy bites.

If I dare to leave my house after dusk, I walk out my front door into a world of no-see-ums. Here is another strange bug name. Why call these obnoxious little midges’ no-see-ums? I see them. I see them all the time. When I am particularly fatigued, ms will cause my eyes to get blurry and my vision to get sparkly and then I see them everywhere! No-see-ums indeed.

Next is the spider living in my bedroom. Why is he still there, you ask? Why didn’t I obliterate him? Because he is smarter and faster than me and even though he doesn’t pay rent, he thinks he owns the place.

I first noticed him when I walked into his web but shook it off thinking I was just having one of my crazy MS sensations. It took a few seconds and then I realized that no, it wasn’t MS but the web of a disgusting arachnid who was at that point leering down at me.

I went to go get something to kill him with and when I came back, he was gone. I tried going for the out of sight, out of mind trick which did not work when I saw him again the next day. And, again, I went to get my bug slaying supplies- tons and tons of paper towels, fly swatter (so what if this is a spider I am dealing with), a broom in case he makes it to the ceiling, and as last resort, the gross, smelly spray. I set everything up and then went after him.

It was then that he out crawled me!

He disappeared. I thought I would leave the bug killing supplies in my room to be ready when I saw him again but of course, I have not. And I am not sure that the icky feeling of walking into webs I have gotten since then is him, MS, or confirmation that I have finally lost it.

 

The band No Doubt has song about my experience.

And now I’m stuck in, the web you’re spinning

You’ve got me for your prey……

You’re intruding on what’s mine

And you’re taking up my time

Don’t have the courage inside me

To tell you ‘please let me be’….

I’m walking into spiderwebs

Finally, two friends came over to help me with a moving project. I needed to remove three heavy objects and have them trashed. This friend and her husband brought their truck over and gratefully took care of this for me. I was super thrilled.

But the real hero of the day was their 7 year old daughter, Madi.

While one friend was carrying something out, a cricket hopped in. Crickets are the worst of the worse for me. They are just too big to kill and if and when you do, you have to crush their hard bodies-major ick!.

Growing up, we had lots of crickets in our house and the trauma of watching them crawl out of the vacuum when my mom thought she would be smart and suck them up, still gives me nightmares.

Being the adult, I thought I should warn Madi of the cricket, less he hops on her. She didn’t see him at first. Trying not to look at him myself, I pointed.

Madi then took her pretty pink flip flop shod foot and stepped on him. Like that, he was no longer a threat. Madi rocks!

As I was saying goodbye to the bravest person in the whole world and her parents, Madi noticed something else. What I thought was a weed on my door was actually another bug. Really? The green weedy thing was yet another bug?

 

Her mom told her that the bug was called a walking stick. Seriously, the bug world needs to re-think its naming process. The innocent looking plant thing was a fascinatingly named insect.

Hearing its name made me wonder what happened to my own walking stick in this whole moving/getting my rental ready for sale process. It has disappeared, unfortunately.

It was just a big stick I found on one of my walks but I liked it. Is this a valid excuse to stop taking walks? Can I use the walking stick bug instead?

Luckily, summer will end soon and I will go from living in the woods to living near the woods and maybe all my bug nemeses will decide they want to stay here. One can hope.

MS gives me enough creepy crawly feelings and enough little icky things flying in front of my eyes, so I certainly don’t need any more.

Isn’t MS enough creepiness to last a lifetime??

PS There is actually a bug that I deeply love, my youngest nephew who I affectionately call my little cuddle bug (talk about strange names- where did I come up with that?) He is one bug I would love to have around me all the time but alas, he lives very far away. He is having a tough week (though you wouldn’t know it from his awesome smile!) and so please allow me to end by sending hugs and kisses to my cuddle bug!