Did you Hear the One about the One MS’er who Drove the Other MS’er to the Neurologist?

A multiple sclerosis road trip

My sister Laurie was not feeling well.  Our neurologist was able to squeeze her into an emergency appointment. Since our neurologist does not practice in a concrete, congested, horribly difficult to navigate city, I was able to drive her there.

But before we began the one hour and 45 minute ride, I had an important errand to do.  I needed to get rid of my stinky trash, and stopping at the trash bin in my mother’s apartment complex seemed the best place to dispose of my refuse.

I pulled alongside the bin, and while simultaneously talking to Laurie and hitting the button on the floor to open the trunk where the stinky trashy was stored, I proceeded to step out of the car. What I forgot was that the car was still in drive.  I turned to walk towards the trunk and the car moved forward, edging dangerously close to a slope with a large tree at the bottom.

My brilliant way of trying to rescue the situation was by grabbing the doorframe of the car and trying to pull it backwards.  Since I am not Superman, it didn’t work.

Luckily, Laurie’s brain fog wasn’t so foggy (apparently mine was worse in that second) to rescue the situation.  She managed to pull the gearshift into park and the car stopped.  Maybe my muscles pulling on the car also helped?  I would like to think so.

This was the start of our road trip.

With my sister, my car, and an innocent tree saved by Laurie’s own problematic hand, we ventured up the highway.  At the next stop, a rest area plaza, we had a little trouble with the door that said for ATM use only.  It was closer to the bathrooms- should we dare use it if we didn’t need to use the ATM?  What if we pretended to use the ATM and then say we changed our minds if we got caught?

Since I had already broken some rules with illegal trash dumping, and Laurie was tired, she decided to be a rebel and use the door.  Luckily, no alarms went off.

We ventured on as Laurie digested her coffee and cookie.  I was proud that I stuck to my bottled water.  It was actually pretty easy; the cookie she bought was oatmeal raisin- I mean really, what’s the point?

While driving and discussing the many various frustrations MS has brought into our lives, we got lost.  Really lost.

Even though I have been to this doctor’s office several times, I was talking so much that I forgot you need to take an exit off of the highway.  Seemed I expected the office to magically appear in front of me while I described frustration #417.   Actually, the fact that the office didn’t magically appear WAS frustration #417.

We were dangerously close to a city when I realized the problem.  I definitely did not want to be behind the wheel in a city.

A couple of fast, curvy exit ramps later, with Laurie clinging to what she liked to call the ‘Oh crap bar,’ and a confusing call to the doctor, we were back on track, miraculously arriving only two minutes late.

Walking in, my sister announced that she had to use the restroom, RIGHT NOW.  She would have to go before she even checked in.  Then she seriously said, “my bladder issues are really starting to piss me off.”

I was surprised.  I didn’t know she had bladder issues.   I was also upset.  That comment was really funny- how come I didn’t think of it?  We giggled which didn’t help her bladder problem.

She saw our doctor and I was even more annoyed that she didn’t get poked with a safety pin like I do when I visit him.  He stepped out of the examination room to look at her MRI’s and it was all I could do not to grab one of the pins and poke her myself- it only seemed fair.

She joked with the doctor about finally being able to wear stilettos once she starts the new walking pill, Ampyra.  We all laughed.   Laurie and I laughed because neither of us has ever been able to wear stilettos, MS or not.  I don’t know what our neurologist was laughing at.

The good news, her concerns were resolved and luckily not as severe as we feared.

Relieved, exhausted and hungry, our next stop was for lunch.  As the driver, I got to pick.  I chose a fast food place- so much for not picking up a Coolatta and a cookie at our earlier stop.

We made it through lunch despite my clumsy left hand flinging a french fry across the restaurant and her having a little trouble the lettuce in her chicken sandwich; vegetables, the trouble always comes from vegetables.

We got on our way again and we made it safely home.  And in our own homes, we each passed out; resting from our road trip and storing up energy for the next one.    Maybe to the grocery store sometime next week…

Friends- don’t forget to enter your title ideas to help me out and win a prize.  You have only until 5/24/13 to enter!  Please see last week’s blog post, What’s in a Name? for contest details.

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