Recently my good friend, My Odd Sock, (yes, one of my friends is a sock, an odd one at that. I am also friendly with my tv, my sofa, my $399 laptop computer that actually cost me $1200 cause I was on my legal speed RX when I bought it and my book collection-even though I tried to sell some of my book friends at a flea market yesterday.) Anyway, My Odd Sock made the comment that “the farther you are from a bathroom-the worse you have to go.”
Ahh, how true My Odd Sock friend. I would add to that though. You must drink a lot of water to benefit your health, but the more water you drink, the less likely you are to ever leave your bathroom.
This thought is what I like to call a multiple sclerosis conundrum. Mr. Webster defines a conundrum as “a riddle whose answer involves a pun, a question or problem having a conjectural answer or an intricate and difficult problem.” By the way, looking up definitions or spelling of words is a conundrum in itself as how can you look up something if you don’t know how to spell it? In the minutes it has taken to write this blog I have looked up how to spell “conundrum” five times. I keep forgetting to just check how I spelled it in the prior sentence.
Like all things related to MS, an MS conundrum adds even more puzzlement to any old regular conundrum. Little makes sense in an MS world, as I keeping finding out daily. Here are some more MS conundrums to drive a person insane.
In order for the MS’er to get more energy, you should eat healthy foods. Yet it takes a ton of energy to purchase and prepare healthy foods. Cases in point- I can get in my car and drive through the local drive-thru in a quarter of the time and energy it takes to prepare a salad. I can rip open a bag of chips or take the top off a pint of ice cream expending a zillion times less energy than it would take to cook up a batch of broccoli.
As MS is an invisible illness, the better you look, the more people think you don’t have MS. The more you try to explain, the more they think you are lying to them. The more lying they think you are doing, the more convinced they are that there is nothing wrong with you. Which would be ok, except then they are annoyed when you don’t actually look so great and want to know what’s wrong with you.
Back to the bladder thing. I can take medicine to control my outrageous bladder but it gives me the worst case of dry mouth on the entire planet. The only relief from THAT is drinking more water which totally negates the effects of the medicine and then I STILL wind up in the bathroom all night. Perhaps I should move my pillow and tv in there….
MS can be expensive. To get money to pay for managing your MS, the more you should work. The more you work, the worse your MS can get. Or in some cases, the more you work, the more tired you get making you mess up at more at work, making your boss wanting you to work less.
And here is one I have only recently discovered, the less money you have, the more you want to spend, especially in regards to MS. I do not have a steady income right now. When I did, I was a super saver, or in other words, cheap.
Yet now that I don’t have a steady income, the more I want to spend, especially on things related to helping me improve my MS. A ton of book friends (that for some strange reason did not sell at the flea market), fancy schmancy cooking tools to help me prepare and eat healthy foods, and, as I type and QVC just happens to be on in the background, the new AB Coaster machine- that thing looks cool.
I can pull out my credit card and have it shipped to my door where I can twist my body into a healthy version of myself.
So what if I felt the same way about my MY MS Yoga DVD (which happened to be free and was ordered when I had money but refused to spend it) and my WiiFit gaming system. So what if they are getting dusty in a corner of the room, this, the Ab Coaster will really help me get fit.
Getting fit will give me more energy even though it takes energy to exercise in order to get fit. Excuse me, please, while I grab my wallet and some Doritos.
If you would also like to become friends with My Odd Sock, then check out his ridiculously funny look at life with a limp on www.myoddsock.com